“Where am I supposed to put it then?”
“Any other place than that, that’s definitely the wrong hole.”
“I didn’t know there was such a thing as the wrong hole.”
“That’s an out-hole. Things aren’t supposed to go in there.”
“How do you know if you’ve never tried?”
“I just know.”
“Babe.”
“Don’t look at me like that. I don’t feel comfortable doing this.”
“You’re going to regret it if you don’t.”
“I highly doubt that.”
“You’d really like it. It’s amazing.”
“How do you know?”
“I just do.”
“That’s disgusting.”
“I think you’re turned on by the fact that I’ve done it.”
“Bite me.”
“Oh, come on. Tell me honestly you’ve never thought about it.”
“I haven’t.”
“Everyone’s thought about it at some point.”
“Not me.”
“Your nose gets that cute wrinkle when you lie.”
“So I’ve thought about. Big deal. Happy now?”
“Yes, I am. Sure you don’t want to try? Just once?”
“I’m positive. And my nose doesn’t wrinkle.”
“Please…?”
“Don’t ask me to do this; you know I’m a sucker for you asking nicely.”
“Just one time. For me. Please.”
“Again with the please…Fuck, I can’t believe I’m going to do this.”
“I love you.”
“You’re going to have to prove it to me after this.”
“Gladly. You ready?”
“I think so.”
“Come on then, press against it.”
“Oh my God, it will never fit inside.”
“It will fit, try again.”
“It’s too tight.”
“You’re not trying hard enough.”
“Maybe we need some vaseline?”
“Just push, will you.”
“Holy crap, it actually went inside.”
“See, I told you it would be fun.”
“What happens now?”
“Now we wait.”
“For what?”
“We wait for Nicky and Mike to start the car and then watch their faces as that potato shoots out of the tailpipe.”
This post is part of Nicky and Mike’s 30 Minus 2 Days of Writing challenge. Today’s prompt is Road trip. Go check out We Work For Cheese for a list of the other participants. *
hahahahahahaha had I not known the prompt I could've really mistaken what was going on ;)
ReplyDeleteHa, ha. I got this...in the end.
ReplyDeleteHah! These are just getting worse and worse! :D
ReplyDeleteGood thing you knew the prompt. ;)
ReplyDeleteYou. Are. Evil. It's what I love most about you.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that you didn't go down that other road...
ReplyDeleteBad you - you're supposed to leave some of it sticking out - or use a banana.
ReplyDeleteHey Ziva! Heh, my mind needs a good washing out, clearly =) All good clean fun in the end. Indigo x
ReplyDeleteThank you, gorgeous, that's the nicest compliment anyone's ever given me!
ReplyDeleteI've no idea what you're talking about... ;)
ReplyDeleteOh, my bad!
ReplyDeleteGood clean fun, that's Ziva for you. ;)
ReplyDeletePass the soap ;)
ReplyDeleteIt's not what it sounded like, but still a bit naughty, eh?
ReplyDeleteI was getting very nervous reading this. I thought you had perhaps gone off (in?) the deep end. I'm so relieved!
ReplyDeleteHee Hee. Love it. Ka-boom!
ReplyDeleteKa-boom, indeed! I bet Nicky and Mike were surprised, too.
ReplyDeleteHah! I wouldn't dismiss the possibility yet. ;)
ReplyDeleteAlways a bit naughty here at my place. ;)
ReplyDeleteActually, the potato would cause a high pitched whine as exhaust is forced out around it. The more you press on the gas, the higher the pitch. This is just a theory of course as I know nothing about sabotaging the headmasters car back in high school. Nope. Nothing at all. * whistles and walks away slowly *
ReplyDeleteBWAHAHAHAHAHAHA You dirty-minded Fin. Or at least the innuendos and all. Good stuff. Well done, Ziva. :)
ReplyDeleteFan-freakin-tastic. Now I'm all hawt and bothered. Can we do this again tomorrow?
ReplyDeleteI had to change my shorts before I got to the end.
ReplyDeleteBAHAHAHA!!! You are one sick fucking genius... I like that in a person. :)
ReplyDeleteBoom! That's a hell of a punchline. Well played, Ziva.
ReplyDeleteOK, I simply have no words. You are a true craftsman of words.... this is HYSTERICAL!!!! Naughty, funny.... potatoey!
ReplyDeleteHah, thanks Katherine, I'm glad you appreciate my twisted sense of humor. ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks, KZ! :)
ReplyDeleteHah! Thank you, Jayne, I take that as a great compliment. ;)
ReplyDeleteEwww
ReplyDeleteYour place or mine?
ReplyDeleteThanks P.J! Something tells me you're just as dirty-minded. ;)
ReplyDeleteHah! You are so busted, Mike!
ReplyDeleteYours of course. I yearn to get back to my great-grandfather's homeland. I think he'd approve.
ReplyDeleteI think so, too. :) I'll be waiting.
ReplyDeleteIt also occurred to me that it's far too bright here for you at this time of year. I wouldn't to disturb your love of your winter.
ReplyDeleteYou are so kind to me!
ReplyDeleteBest plot twist, ever!
ReplyDeleteGlad you enjoyed it, Meleah. ;)
ReplyDeleteI really DID!
ReplyDelete