So I Googled love. I know, I'm pathetic. Wikipedia told me that love is "an emotion of strong affection and personal attachment." But that didn't exactly help me with the picture, now did it? So I read some more. I learned that the Greek have about as many words for love as the Inuit have for snow. I also learned that in a philosophical context, "love is a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection". Big words, huh? Not much to take a picture of, though.
Wikipedia listed all sorts of different kinds of love, and even went as far as to say that some people argue that what we understand as love is just "an evolved state of the survival instinct, primarily used to keep human beings together against menaces and to facilitate the continuation of the species through reproduction." Yikes. Try to take a picture of that one.
When Wikipedia couldn't tell me any more, I Google love again and found something called a Love Calculator. I entered M's name and my own, and found out that our relationship has a 68% chance of success. Then I entered my own name and the name of my secret lover, and found out we only have a 17% chance of success. I knew the race thing would come back to bite us in the ass, what with him being a monkey and all. Then I entered in the name of the Ex, and learned that our chances of success were 93%. Since my relationship with the Ex ended so well, I decided that the calculator was probably defect.
Then I ran an anti-virus program to help with the sudden pop-up problem I had after visiting that site.
Next, I came across some love quotes.
Aristotle went all sappy on me and said, "love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies." Aww. Aphra Behn countered with, "each moment of a happy lover's hour is worth an age of dull and common life." So profound. Next, Ralph Waldo Emerson did a little soul searching and came up with: Thou art to me a delicious torment." Short, to the point. I like it. And Jeremy Taylor said, "love is friendship set on fire." Ouch. And someone who preferred to remain anonymous finished the sappy party with the words, "to be your friend was all I ever wanted; to be your lover was all I ever dreamed."
After reading the quotes I felt a little teary-eyed, so I kicked a dog and immediately felt better. And I promised myself I was done researching love.
And the picture?
Just some flowers on my balcony. Sometimes the simplest things say the most.
*
Out of curiousity, I used the Love Calculator to assess my chances of having a successful relationship with Olivia Wilde. The answer was 1 percent. But it came with this helpful advice:"Dr. Love thinks a relationship might work out between Michael Whiteman-Jones and Olivia Wilde, but the chance is very small. A successful relationship is possible, but you both have to work on it. Do not sit back and think that it will all work out fine, because it might not be working out the way you wanted it to. Spend as much time with each other as possible. Again, the chance of this relationship working out is very small, so even when you do work hard on it, it still might not work out."
ReplyDeleteMost of that's crap, especially the part about how it might or might not work out, which is as usual as saying you might or might not win the lottery. But I did notice the line that says, "Spend as much time with each other as possible." I'm sending her an e-mail as we speak.
Your photograph is beautiful, Ziva. I love the composition and the pale color, which gives it a timeless quality. And, of course, the heart shape hidden in the railing in the background is priceless.
which is as useful, not usual...
ReplyDeleteGorgeous photo! The color tones are awesome. I also love the quotations. Lovely, really. I think love can really be summed up in four words: "I got your back".
ReplyDeleteThe beauty of this photo is overshadowed by the discovery that you have a secret lover who is a monkey....
ReplyDeleteJepeto is your secret lover?!?!?!
So you and I only have a 17% chance of success? Did it have anything to do with me setting you on fire with that virus? Shucks. Love the pic. Oh, see what I did there?
ReplyDeleteOh crap, we didn't want you to find out like this. I'm so sorry, my darling Nicky. Just think of it as me giving you a day off from Jepeto and his hairy butt.
ReplyDeleteI'd prefer you anyway, but you're always busy with Cheese.
Yes, that really does sum it up perfectly! I'm glad you liked the picture. :-)
ReplyDeleteWow, you have Olivia Wilde's e-mail address? And you didn't share? Man, so not cool. Good luck, though, I'm sure she'll happily give up everything to come live with you and see if your 1 percent chance of success will work out.
ReplyDelete"Love the pic." Hah!
ReplyDeleteBaby, I would dump the cheese in a heartbeat for you. Well, ok, I would ignore it until you left the next morning.
ReplyDeleteLovely, just lovely.
ReplyDeleteNever trust science predicting the success of relationships. Just take one of the quizzes that get published in women's magazines.
:)
Oh I really do *love* those flowers. What a beautiful photo.
ReplyDeleteBTW: this made me laugh out loud:
"After reading the quotes I felt a little teary-eyed, so I kicked a dog and immediately felt better."
HA!
Heheh, no animals were hurt in the making of this post. I promise.
ReplyDeleteOh, I should have taken one of those. Now I have to go out and buy a women's magazine so I'll know if M and I should really get married or if I should just focus on the monkey.
ReplyDeleteWould you have me sneak out at dawn, or is it okay if I stay for breakfast?
ReplyDelete