I have a problem, and I think you might be able to help me. The problem is that I live in Finland. Well, that’s not my actual problem, but I have traced my problem back to this, and I believe that my living in Finland is the root to this particular problem. See, I live in a time zone called Eastern European Summer Time. It’s a very exotic time zone, if I do say so myself. In a few months, it will just be called Easter European Time, and it won’t be nearly as exotic. At the moment, this means that I’m at GMT+3 hours. Or, to put it in language even an American could understand, I’m 7 hours ahead of Eastern, 8 hours ahead of Central, 9 hours ahead of Mountain and 10 hours ahead of Pacific Time. And to go even further, so that even a Canadian could understand, that means that when I go to bed, it’s 3 PM where Mike lives and 5 PM where Nicky and Frank live, who are probably just getting home from work when I go to bed. And that’s just to name a couple. Everyone but me is living in a decent time zone.
That means that while I’m busy sleeping, everyone else is busy blogging. All major blogging takes place while I’m asleep, and so does all major commenting. My comment field has an entire life of its own whenever I’m asleep, or out partying, or busy studying. I miss out on everything just because I’m living in this exotic, yet completely impractical time zone. I’ve suggested to M that we convert to a less exotic time zone, like perhaps Eastern, but he really doesn’t see the advantages it would bring. He’s all “but it would be dark all the time and everyone else would be asleep and no stores would be open and everyone would try to get a hold of us while we’re sleeping because you know, that would be daytime for them.” And I’m all “but honey, I could read blogs the minute they’re posted and I could comment on them when everyone else is commenting.” And he’s all “you need help.”
And that’s why I need your help. I need a way to convert Finland to American time. I know this will take a lot of hard work, and that some of you might feel that I should just move to America, but I can’t really be bothered with moving again, it’s a hassle. And I just know that together we can do it. Like, maybe we could start a petition? Or we could all compromise and switch to British time. And start driving on the left side of the road.
Now, I wrote the above post yesterday, and was going to post it tonight as it was, but then something happened that I just had to add. My friends and I had a girls’ night out and I told Dani about my plan to convert Finland to American time. And she said perhaps the smartest thing anyone has ever said. And after having had a few glasses of wine, that is a lot to say about Dani. This is the girl who had a beer with Zelma and me when we were 16 and couldn’t figure out how to walk around the cat. Anyway, what Dani said was, “wouldn’t it make more sense to just have the rest of the world convert to Finnish time?” I realize that the girls’ night out might have made me a little drunk and that technically I shouldn’t be blogging right now, but I just can’t help it. My god, Dani is right. Americans, Canadians, and that one person from Chile who reads my blog, unite! Fight for your right to blog in the right time zone!
While you’re busy uniting, I have to get to bed. Again. I bet you’re just getting home from work, aren’t you? *