I’ve been away. Again. Not literally, just figuratively speaking. I know I promised I would never leave my blog for any length of time again, and I know that some of you even sent me worried emails asking me if I finally sought out professional help and am now locked into an asylum. However, I did not seek help. My absence can be explained by a far simpler reason.
I’m having a mid-life crisis.
It all started when I realized that on August 25 my blog will turn one whole year. It’s been a great year. I’ve made some amazing new friends; I’ve had a lot of fun writing, and even more fun reading other people’s blogs. But still one year seems like a very long time to do nothing but write about inane stuff and create horribly mediocre text. So I had something of an early mid-life crisis.
I cut off all contact with the internet. A huge storm helped with this. Then I bought a Ferrari, drove it into a tree, sold the Ferrari and bought a motorcycle instead. I drove the motorcycle into a ditch and recognized it for the stupid idea that it was. I then developed an acute case of alcoholism, drove away the wife and kids and sought help in AA. I bought a tinwhistle, learned to play Old MacDonald on it and joined a band that played Irish music. I then got kicked out of the band when I dressed up as a leprechaun for band practice, and threw the tin whistle into my new 42” flatscreen TV. I pleaded for the wife and kids to come back when I realized that no one was doing the dishes and then finally checked back with the internet.
What I’m trying to say is that I’m back. Figuratively speaking. *