Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Oi maamme Suomi

Finally, it’s official. I’ve been saying it for years – I’ve preached to the ignorant, walked around with big cardboard signs, trying to convey my message, I’ve done everything to get the point across, but no one believed me. Well you can’t ignore me now, fools!

The best place to live in the entire world is… you guessed it – Finland!!

According to an extensive Newsweek study, Finland is (and always will be) the best place to live. In fact, the Nordic countries all made it into the top 10. Even Canada did well and came in 7th place. Canada obviously can’t compete with almighty Finland, but that’s okay, few places can. What about the USA, you ask? They finished so far down the list that my computer broke when I tried to scroll down to them.

The study took into consideration a number of factors such as health, economic dynamism (the openness of a country's economy and the breadth of its corporate sector), education, political environment, and quality of life. Good thing they didn’t use weather as a factor or Finland would have been right at the bottom of the list with Nigeria.

You want to live here, right? Right?

You'd think the weather would have a negative effect on the quality of life, but I guess they didn't take that into consideration either. Education on the other hand, I totally get because I’ve spent about 18 years of my life in some school or other. 18 years seems like an awfully long time to be studying, don’t you think? Gosh, I sure hope I’m smart now. Well, at least I'm smart enough to live in Finland. Are you? *


  1. I believe that's the new Finnish tourism slogan:

    Are you smart enough to live in Finland?
    Probably not.
    But you may be smart enough to visit.

  2. Ziva, girls like you make it possible for Finland to reach #1. With such hot women, you need the cold for contrast.

  3. Yeah, I'm dropping everything and moving to Finland.



  4. From the looks of your weather, Finland would be my #1 too!

  5. Baby, I always knew you were the best! And of course Canada is #7. We're so polite we keep letting other countries cut in line ahead of us.

  6. Congrats to Finland!! I wouldn't mind living there, and I think I'm relatively intelligent enough to blend in.


  7. Congratulations on being number one! Sort of. It looks like you and I had the same thing on our minds again, Ziva, and I'm not talking about baby oil and hot wax.

  8. The U.S. has deteriorated in every way: schools, jobs, healthcare. There doesn't seem to be a middle anymore, except for me. I'm a middle child.

    I hate cold weather. If I move, it would be to some place hot, not Nigeria. I live in the northeast where it gets really cold during the winter and snow is more visible than garden gnomes; only their pointy hats can be seen poking through the snow.

    I even get cold in the summer in air conditioning. I probably need to live in a temperature regulated bubble but not a bazooka bubble, a non-stick bubble that you don't need to chew in order to achieve bubbledom.

  9. Frank: I bet you're smart enough to live in Finland. Come on over!

    nonamedufus: Congrats! I'm proud of you Canadians.

    Linda: You would fit right in here in Finland.

    Reffie: Well damn, I was looking forward to your company!

    middle child: Finally someone who appreciates good weather. ;)

    Nicky: Canada is great, you should be in 2nd place. Right after Finland.

    00dozo: You would definitely blend in! Well, as long as you don't actually say anything, in which case people might start to suspect you're not entirely Finnish...

    MikeWJ: Thank you Mike, I'm glad you're such a dignified loser. Now, about that baby oil and hot wax...

    Lauren: A non-stick bubble to fix all your temperature problems? What a wonderful idea!

  10. "I probably need to live in a temperature regulated bubble but not a bazooka bubble, a non-stick bubble that you don't need to chew in order to achieve bubbledom."

    Lauren, I love this seemingly bizarre but very understandable thought. I think this idea about creating bubbledom with non-stick bubblegum that you don't have to chew is awesome and should be turned into a short story, maybe even a book.

  11. Let's do it! We can all be bubbledomers and bounce around happily in our non-stick temperature regulated bubbles. Though, I fear I might spend my days bouncing off the walls.



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