Monday, June 21, 2010

Post-It Art

My sister came to me today at work and told me my blog echoes and made me promise I’d post something tonight. (I think she might have overreacted, though – everyone knows my blog doesn’t echo, it’s like a duck.) Nevertheless, I’m sitting here, posting something tonight. Except it’s been so long since I posted anything that I’m starting to feel the pressure. With every day spent procrastinating, the expectations grow higher and higher. The way I’ve been going I should be posting the great American novel today. Or at the very least some minor poetry. Sadly, my brain is too tired for anything slightly resembling classy writing, so I’ll just focus on me, my work, Muschu and karate.

See, I work at a hospital. I write invoices, transcribe the nonsense the doctors dictate, pay bills, keep track of the book keeping, and other miscellaneous duties mostly performed by a secretary. My mother works at the same hospital. She's the head of the long-term ward and scares the crap out of people has earned the respect of the 30-something people she's the boss of. One of those 30-something people is my sister. She works as a nurse at the same ward and is not afraid of mom. Patients love her and she loves them. She's not a nurse for real, though. She's a recently graduated designer. She paints and draws and sews and builds tables and a whole bunch of other stuff. The other day she came up to my office just to say hi. I love it when she does this because I can take a break from not working to talk to her, but at the same time it's very dangerous to have her visit. The last time she visited my office she drew pictures of germs on post-it notes and stuck them all around the room.

The other day was a good post-it day for Muschu, and she started by drawing "silence of the lambs".

Then she decided Hannibal Lecter was a little too morbid for her tastes, and channeled some good old Survivor with...

..."eye of the tiger". You guessed it.

Next, I told her I wanted a picture of a rabbit. Sadly, I think she misheard me.

I don't know if that’s roadkill or dinner, but it's still kind of pretty. Don’t worry, though, she actually is a very good artist. And probably adopted. This is what M and I have hanging on the wall in our bedroom. Muschu painted the gorgeous prima ballerina, while the wonderful still life was painted by my good friend Jenn. The naked lady I won in a contest. I love her.

Now as if I don't get enough good vibes with Muschu visiting me at work all the time, Linda gave me a blogging award! Thank you Linda, you’re the sweetest.

It's a karate/mastering different things kind of award, which is very ironic, because I've never mastered a thing in my life, karate being at the very top of the list of things I haven’t mastered. M and Muschu, however, have both mastered the art of kicking ass. M has a brown belt in karate and Muschu has a something-something belt in taekwondo. What do I do, you ask? I play the piano (badly, I might add) in the background while they’re working up a sweat, saving me from the bad guys. Wanna hear?

If you listen carefully you can hear M swear in the background when he stubs his toe doing some kick-flippy-doo-dah. I was going to perform Bach’s Air for you, but then I chose Celine Dion because I know how much you all love her, plus, I have a bunch of Canadians reading my blog who will just love me for reminding them of what they let loose on the world.

Oh yeah, the award. I’m supposed to list six things that I have mastered in my life. I asked M if the whole thing with bleeding five days a month without dying might count towards things mastered, but he didn’t think so.

1. I’ve mastered the original Super Mario Bros for my good old 8-bit Nintendo.
2. I’ve mastered the alphabet. (If I’m allowed to sing it.)
3. I’ve mastered the art of appearing deeply fascinated when I couldn’t give a crap.
4. I’ve mastered the art of avoiding all cameras at any event.
5. I’ve mastered the stick shift.
6. I’ve mastered the very fine art of procrastination. (But for the life of me, I cannot spell it correctly on the first try.)

So there you have it. A new post, some art, some music, some awards. Life is good. *


  1. Speaking on behalf of Canadians everywhere. We're sorry. Really, really sorry. Sometimes something like a Celine will slip past our Department of Not Exporting Things That Make Us Look Like Wimps and Idiots (the DNETTMULLWI), and she's one of them. (So was William Shatner, but that one turned out all right.) On the other hand, this is actually a nice tune played on the piano and without the shrieking.

    Nice to have you back.

    (PS: the Captcha code -- or whatever it's called here -- was "lizemeon," which sounds like the love child by Liza Minnelli and Celine Dion.

  2. You + Piano = Beauty
    You made me cry.

  3. Yes, the drawings are a bit scary but the ballerina is beautiful. I feel so graceful looking at her.

    Congrats on the mastery. It takes a real artist to master #4!

  4. Ok, this is the last time I'm going to say it. We're really, really, really sorry about Celine. We just wanted to get her out of Canada for a while. We didn't think anyone else would want her and she would fade into obscurity, spirit crushed by worldwide mockery and rejection. Now that I think about it, we don't apologize. You all had the chance to dash her dreams but instead you bought her albums by the truckload, reams and reams of her sheet music, and her concert tickets in droves. It's your own damn fault people! Suck it up.

    You played it beautifully, Lemmikki. I would imagine the third hand makes you a natural.

    Your sister is quite a gifted artist! How much does she want for the post-it notes? I'm especially fond of the bunny rabbit.

    I think maybe you should make M. bleed for 5 days, and then ask him if he still thinks it doesn't count. I have a feeling his answer might change.

  5. Oh, after all that rambling, I forgot to say congratulations on your award!


  6. Okay, if you did not already make me feel like I might become lesbian for you, now you have done it for sure. You are an amazing pianist. Stop being shy about being so frigging gifted! (And beautiful, but the extra arm or green hue never mattered to me in the first place!) Yes, of course congrats on the award and for being talented enough to take a break from not working to talk to your wonderful sis. It's kind of like Prince in his "Doing something next to nothing, but different from the day before!"

  7. I'd also become a lesbian for you, and it's actually possible because I only live a few hundred miles away from the sex-change capital of the world, Trinidad, Colo. Unfortunately, as much as I imagine I'd enjoy being a lesbian, especially if I got to wear lingerie and have multiple orgasms, I really can't afford the surgery, and it would be terribly disappointing to my wife.

    I think.

    Anyway, you and I have 3,4 and 6 in common, especially 3 and 6. Lately, though, I'm having a hard time even pretending to give a crap. I just want to sit around and do nothing all day. Too bad about work, huh? I wish somebody interesting like your sister would come and give me a break from not working once in a while.

  8. Your back!! I missed ya.

    Ha! Your number 6 is my profession and 3, 4 and 5 is what we also have in common.

    You think you play the piano "badly"? I think NOT! That piece was beautifully done! (And thank you for not having Celine break out in song.)

    I, too, am sorry for Canada's inflicting Celine upon the masses. But we did make up for it with other musicians like The Tragically Hip, Fiona Boyd, Yo Ma Ma (oops, I mean Yo Yo Ma), among others.

    You and your sister are wonderfully talented! I'm so jealous.

    And, Congrats! on the award.

  9. I've been trying to master the art of procrastination, but I keep putting it off. One of these days. Hey. The post was just like a novel but only shorter. Congrats on the award. Great pictures and talents.

  10. Frank - We accept your apology. And I'm glad my playing didn't make you vomit or anything. Also - the love child of Liza Minnelli and Celine Dion? Are you trying to give me nightmares??

    middle child - I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry! I didn't think I hit you that hard. Really. (I'm kidding, I'm glad you enjoyed the tune.)

    ReformingGeek - Ohh yes, every night I look at the ballerina and pretend I look like her. It helps me sleep better at night.

    Nicky - The third arm really does come in handy when I play the piano. Two for the piano, one to hold the drink. It's almost too good to be true. Oh, and Muschu says the post-its are yours for 10 euros a piece, plus postage.

    Nicky - Thank you!

    Linda - I am very talented indeed - I can take a break from doing almost anything! I won't ask you to become a lesbian for me, not that it wouldn't be totally awesome, but I think poor Alex might dislike it.

    MikeWJ - In all fairness, we all know you've been wearing lingerie for ages already. And you can't really be too sure unless you consult with your wife first. Who knows, maybe Kerry has been hoping you'll find your inner woman for years. You should really ask her. Want me to send you virtual post-it notes while you're at work to help with the boredom?

    00dozo - Thank you! I am indeed back, lets hope my inspiration makes like an STD and sticks around this time. I didn't have Celine around to sing, and think you might have disliked my voice even more than hers, hence the purely instrumental piece this time. Maybe you can sing next time?

    Muschu - "Ohh you idiot!"

    Lauren - You haven't gotten around to it, huh? Imagine that. Thanks Lauren, I'm very happy you didn't laugh and point at our talents.

  11. I work on the IT side of digital radiology, and I know that radiologists are making it up half the time. Sometimes I like to mess with them and edit their images with helpful annotations like "brain" and "foot bone" with big arrows pointing to said body parts.

    Oh by the way, thanks for getting Celine stuck in my head this morning. I was going to comment earlier, but I was too upset. Even though your playing was beautiful. It was as if I was admitting to liking Celine, when I was only liking your playing.

  12. mike - There's no denying it now, you like Celine Dion. I'll go get the straitjacket.

    I bet the images make a lot more sense with your helpful commentary. Personally, I like to completely ignore it every time the doctor dictates stuff like "severe arthrosis deformans genu l.a." and instead write "patient suffers from severe pony-foot syndrome complete with cupcake hoof and bouncy tail." They'll fire me any day now.

  13. You know, I really don't like that song at all --- till I heard you playing it on your piano...


  14. You play the piano soooooo beautifully AND have that awesome rabbit picture?

    Sign me up for lesbian too please - my husband won't care.


    Thank you. Obviously, Ziva is beautiful and talented. I just wanted to say I fell for Ziva first so the lesbian line starts with me. You'll all just have to wait for Ziva and I (and our leopard, chicken and panda costumes, handcuffs, whip cream etc.) to finally satiate our mad lust for each other! It may take some time. You may now return to your regular commenting.

    Thank you.

  16. ɹǝƃƃolquǝʞoʇ - No, thank you! Your comment made up for years of piano lesson trauma. It definitely seems worth it now.

    Mrsblogalot - Awesome! The rabbit picture has brought me nothing but amazing things, and I've only had it for a few days! If you're sure your husband won't mind, I'll sign you up! (Because we all know I'm the official keeper of the records for all things lesbian.)

    Nicky - Awwww! For you, the post-its are free of charge.

  17. Yes, please send some virtual post-it notes.

  18. MikeWJ - I'll get right on it! Soon...

  19. I hope you get this. I was thinking of an instumental piano piece today that reminded me of this post and that I forgot to mention it earlier. If you really like piano, you should listen to Suzanne Ciani, particularly her "Pianissimo" CD (the first one). The "Rain" song is done all in staccato and is one of my favourites. I think you'll like it.


  20. 00dozo: I saw this comment a while back, but I haven't been able to find a decent copy of the song on the internet. I'm going to see if I can download the entire CD somewhere and have a listen. I'm sure I will love it. :)



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