It was brought to my attention that the harmless druggie that was arrested at Subway yesterday, while M and I were having a nutritious and healthy dinner, wasn’t a harmless druggie at all. He was an escaped inmate who was receiving medical care at the hospital. No wonder the cops seemed so eager to take him in.
M and I live next to the hospital, and I’ve never thought that it could present a danger for us. Which is silly, really, because I’ve worked at another hospital for years and I’ve seen the crazies first hand. Once I was assaulted by a woman who was high as a kite and suicidal. The cops came and saved me, but it took 4 police officers to get her into cuffs and into the van. And at several occasions we've had the local winos come in. Sometimes they throw bottles, but most of the time they just pee on the floor. Marking their territory, I suppose.
Luckily, I live in one of the safest countries in the world and inmates on the run is something that doesn’t happen very often. Which is sad, I’m way more popular today than I was yesterday.
A country that isn’t as lucky, though, is our neighboring Russia. Yesterday morning two suicide bombers went to work at two Moscow metro stations, killing 38 people, injuring many more. Russia blames Chechnya and demands international aid. Seeing as Russia is always the first to come to other countries help, I bet Obama will immediately stop funding abortions with tax money (universal healthcare – ha! whoever gave him that idea?) for as long as it takes to level Chechnya with the ground, “preferably using nuclear weapons”, as one Russian woman said in the news.
I’m particularly fond of the nuclear bomb idea – it’s been way too long since we had a good world war on our hands. Also, I was about one year old when Chernobyl didn’t happen. (Shh – the Russians are listening.) The contaminated rain water was delicious, and I’m very fond of my third arm.
In other news, my Easter chick had a bunch of baby chicks and found her baby daddy. Or was it the other way around? I can never remember; which one came first, the chicken or the egg?
Watch That Grass Grow!
The chicken and the egg are actually symbiotic and identical subspecies of an extinct parent species called the chegg.
Baby chicks, wondering why daddy is green when they’re obviously not.*