Lately, I’ve been having a rather absurd problem. I know what you’re thinking, but that’s not it; I have pills for that.
The problem is that I’ve been spreading my S around. Yes, my S. My letter S. I keep adding an extra S to the end of words, inadvertently pluralizing the singular subject, making the still-singular verb ill-fitted to deal with the multiplex nature of the subject. In other words, I’ve become grammatically challenged. Or, to use the politically correct term, I have become a person with grammatical disabilities.
Or just plain stupid, for those of you who are synonymically challenged.
I didn’t mean for it to happen. One day it just did. Pesky little ‘S’s, creeping into posts, multiplying, fornicating, breeding, infesting my text with their twisty little offspring.
I can’t help but wonder where all these extra ‘S’s are coming from, and logically, there’s only one explanation. It’s a well known fact that the modern S is a fairly impractical letter, and I can only assume I’m ahead of my time, predicting the end of the S and my subconscious is now trying to get rid of all of my ‘S’s by spreading them around. It’s probably in your best interest to do the same; when the time comes you do not want to sit there with a crapload of extra ‘S’s and nowhere to put them.
Remember, you heard it from me first.
Now go, my friends!
Spread your S around!
This post is part of Nicky and Mike’s 30 Minus 2 Days of Writing challenge. Today’s prompt is Absurd. Go check out We Work For Cheese for a list of the other participants. *