Last weekend I showed my pussy to hundreds of people.
I know what you’re thinking; no way is her pussy pretty enough to be showed to that many people.
But you would be wrong. He definitely is. And the judge agreed.
When Darth Vader heard he was going to a cat show, this is how he looked:
Then he bent down and licked his penis. I tired to explain to him that it wasn’t my choice, that I’d simply promised the breeder I would take him to a show to see how he’d do, and that he’d better just look really crabby and he’d probably never had to do it again.
This is him looking crabby. In his litter box.
And this is him being manhandled by the judge.
As it turns out, people who take their cats to cat shows are very interesting. I saw one woman pushing her two cats in a stroller. I saw a man walking around carrying his huge Maine Coon as if it were a baby. And I saw a woman cry with joy when her ugly naked rat won something.
M and I spent most of the day feeling sorry for Darth Vader in his little cage, and generally not grooming him enough, if the other contestants were to believe. I don’t even brush my hair as much as these people brushed their cats’ coats. Actually, I don’t really brush my hair at all, but that’s beside the point. These people were brushing, spraying, rubbing, powdering, clipping, plucking and wiping their cats. Not necessarily in that order. I actually did bring a brush, but Darth Vader just wanted to play with it.
But M and I did do one thing to prepare the poor kitty for his show. We washed him. Heh heh.
Tell me that isn’t the funniest thing ever. He looks like one of those long-haired rats people are so fond of, what are they called? I can never remember. Oh! Chihuahuas! He looks like a Chihuahua. Try to spell that five times fast.
And this is what we won. I'm going to pin it to the wall so that it's the first thing people see when they come through the front door.
Because more pictures of cats is exactly what the internet needs. *