The perfect woman, right?
Well, if Barbie were life-sized, her measurements would be 39(99cm)-23(58cm)-33(83cm). She would stand seven feet two inches tall (2,2m), and have a neck twice the length of a normal human’s neck.
After a ridiculous amount of time spent in front of the mirror, some rigorous scientific research and careful consideration, I’ve come to the conclusion that this is what I would look like if I were a doll:
Eat your heart out, Barbie. *
OMG!!! That's me in the morning!!! Well, only if the cream has curdled in my coffee.
ReplyDeleteWHERE ON EARTH DID YOU FIND THAT BABY PICTURE OF JEPETO?!?!
ReplyDeleteBaby, you got your calculations mixed up. You know you look very similar to Barbie but better built and brunet of course.
ReplyDeleteYeah. Me, too.
ReplyDeleteScary.
Why would Barbie's neck be twice as long as normal? What possible use would a long-legged, incredibly busty girl like her have for that?
ReplyDeleteWait.
Oh......
And Ziva, that doll can't be you. You have three arms and green skin. Nice try, though.
00dozo: I feel a lot better knowing that I'm not the only one who needs a bottle of blood first thing in the morning.
ReplyDeleteNicky: Holy Supreme Wind, Jepeto is my doppelgänger!
Linda: Sure, if by "better built" you mean short and stubby.
Reffie: I particularly like the red eyes, I'm glad we have them in common.
MikeWJ: If you look closely, you can see a green tinge to the skin around the eyes, and the third arm is hidden under the bottle of blood.
Ziva, where did you find that doll? Is someone making a voodoo doll of you? I can assure you that I'm not the one making it - and I didn't ask the voodoo priestess to make me one either. It just must have fallen out from the sky from nowhere. That must be it.
ReplyDeleteM: You had a voodoo priestess make a voodoo doll of me?? I'm so proud of you!
ReplyDeleteI don't know why I didn't notice the headline earlier, but now that I have, may I say that it's really, really funny? 'Cause it is. A brush, a pony and a severed head! Love it! I'm getting one for my daughters, Beazlebub and Romoaning.
ReplyDeleteYou are hilarious. I think you're the devil that sits on my left shoulder. Could you move a little to the left. Your pointy elbow is impaling my neck.
ReplyDeleteHAAAA! I highly doubt that..
ReplyDeleteFunny, that's how I see Barbie.
Now she's scary!
And so you're saying there'd be a problem if Barbie were life-sized? I'm not seeing it.
ReplyDeleteMikeWJ: Everything should come with a severed head, don't you think?
ReplyDeleteLauren: Oops, my bad, I thought you liked the pointy elbow...
Mrsblogalot: You know what would have been really scary? If they had used a Barbie mask in the Scream movies. Talk about a nightmare.
nonamedufus: Of course you don't. Here, have a severed head!